15 Weeks Pregnant

Another Video. Enjoy.

14 Weeks Pregnant

Another video.. Sorry.. I'm just too lazy to type everything out when I have already said it.. lol

13 Weeks Pregnant

Okay so yes I know this is yet another video. It just seems to be easier and I can fit a lot more into an entry. Don't forget to pause the music.

12 Week Update

Another video. Just remember to pause the music.

11 Week Update via Video

I didn't get a chance to take a picture this week and I happened to make a video blog for youtube so I will post that instead. Just remember to scroll down to the bottom and pause the blog music.

10 Weeks Pregnant.

This week has not been good. I have been so nauseous and have had so many headaches. There are very few things that I can eat that don't turn my stomach and even those few things are starting to not sound good because I eat them so often. I spent the majority of Sunday and Monday in bed while Nathan took care of the boys. I am so exhausted. This pregnancy has been kicking my butt. I am not one to go by the way that you are feeling determining the gender of the baby because my pregnancies with Joel and Colin were both different, but this one has been SO different that I am starting to wonder if it is a girl. That is my prediction at his point.

I took Joel to the doctor on Thursday to have him looked at to see if the mono is gone. My doctor said he looks healthy and back to normal, so that is good. However, while I was there he told me that my blood-work came back showing that I have hyperthyroidism. I am going to be going to see a specialist about it and will probably have to have blood work done quite frequently and monthly ultrasounds to make sure the baby is doing well. It has about a 1% risk of causing birth defects so they just want to make sure everything is looking good. Just add this to all the things that don't go as normal in my pregnancies. There always has to be something off.

Saturday Update: 9 weeks

I swear my belly looks smaller this week. Strange how that happens since I take my photo the same day every week at the same time.

This week I have been feeling a little woozier. It seems to come in the mornings and night especially and I haven't been able to take my prenatals for the past few days because they have been making me really nauseous. I have been exhausted too but I am not sure if that is because the boys are getting up several times every night or if it is because I am pregnant. I am going to attribute it to both.

So I bought the boys Christmas jammies a couple days ago. They were a wicked deal and I didn't even have to go to the store. I think with shipping and everything they ended up costing me $30 dollars for both. This is what they look like.


Last night I went out with a bunch of ladies from my weekly mom's group for dinner and then I got to sleep in because Nathan took the boys to his parents house for the night. It was glorious to be able to sleep all the way until morning and get up when I so chose. I definitely appreciated it.

Guess thats about it for the week. Thought it would be fun to take a poll to see what everyone thinks baby is at this point. Just leave your choice in your post.

8 Week Update

I was officially 8 weeks on Thursday. Not too much is new. My pants are getting tighter all the time and I may have to go buy a bella band soon so that I can atleast leave my pants undone. Otherwise for the most part I am feeling pretty good. I still have to make sure I eat asap when I wake up in the morning, but thats about as bad as it gets.

My sister Tara had her ultrasound on Thursday and they found out they are expecting their first son! They have 2 girls already so I am excited that they will get to find out what it is like to have a sweet baby boy. It really didn't matter to me what sex they had. I am just happy to hear that he is healthy.

So we are officially done with the birthday parties for Colin. We had one last Saturday at Nathan's parents and then one yesterday. It was fun! We went trick or treating with all the kids and it was a good time. Next year they all need bigger buckets though because it really doesn't take long to fill up those little pumpkin buckets. Here are some pictures from yesterday.

Picture of Baby Bean

Here is a picture of our beautiful baby, well I think so, at 7 weeks 1 day. This was taken this afternoon at my emergency ultrasound, more about that in a minute. Baby bean is measuring 3 days behind what I thought I should be, so my new due date is June 11, 2009, which also happens to be Nathan and my 4th wedding anniversary. The heart-rate is 131 bpm. As far as can be seen at this point, baby is healthy and well and I am ecstatic!

Now about my emergency ultrasound. The story basically starts on Wednesday night at about 8:00pm. We had just come in for the night after working outside on our fence. The boys were in bed and I went to the washroom, a place I frequent a lot these days. When I went to wipe there was about a teaspoon of pinkish blood on the toilet paper and I FREAKED OUT! Okay maybe not right away but it scared me. I have never bled before with pregnancy, so after a stressful evening of talking to the nurse and friends and family, I resigned myself to wait until morning and call my doctor to request said ultrasound. In the morning there was a little brown blood but that was about it so that eased my mind a bit. I got in to see my doctor at 4:15pm on Thursday afternoon and he did an internal exam to check for bleeding and to make sure my cervix was still closed. No bleeding and cervix closed.. Good sign! He said he wanted to book said ultrasound and here we are... Ultrasound.. new due date.. healthy baby.. a lot less stressed out mommy!!!

It never seems to fail though. Nathan and I seem to have atleast one problem during our pregnancies. With Joel it was a false positive on the triple screen with a high risk for down syndrome which resulted in an amniocentesis at 18 weeks. With Colin he had Choroid Plexis Cysts in his 18 week ultrasound which creates a high risk for Trisomy 18. And this time bleeding and an early ultrasound. I know I am very lucky that I have 2 beautiful healthy children and one on the way so I am not complaining. I have been very blessed, I just wish there didn't always have to be stress involved in getting to that point.

In other news, we set up the boys new room. Temporarily it is Joel's new room, while Colin learns to sleep in a bed. Then in about April Colin will move into the bottom bunk and we will set up the nursery for the new baby. Anyways, I am really happy with the way it all turned out. Here are the results.


I still have a bit more work to do. I want to find a bit more art work and some curtains but that is the main bits.

Colin Singing

Here is a video of Colin singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.. To watch it just scroll down to the bottom and pause the blog music first.

The 2 Year Old and 7 week Update

Here is My 7 week belly. Doesn't look a whole lot bigger but especially with clothes off you can see a difference. It is getting rounder. I love it! I cannot wait until people can tell that I am pregnant. I love everything about it. Well minus the morning sickness. I have been really dizzy in the mornings for the last week and need to eat asap when I first get up or else I become very nauseous. The morning sickness is reassuring to me though. I was always scared with Colin when I didn't have any. I have also been really tired lately. Last night I was in bed by 7:30 and went to sleep about 9. 

I had my first prenatal appointment yesterday. It went well, as well as a 1st prenatal appointment can go anyways. The nurse who did the initial part of my appointment was excellent. She has 3 grown boys at home so she understood what my life is like. After I finished filling out all the paperwork with her I went and had my pap and full physical with my doctor. He is an amazing doctor and it was good to chat with him for a while. He said everything looks good and he wants to see me again routinely until I get in my with my OBGYN.

Mr Colin James turned 2 yesterday. It is hard to believe that 2 years has disappeared already. We took him out for supper last night to Red Lobster. The boys both really like it there because of the live lobster tank they have in the entrance. Neither of them eat seafood though. We are having 2 birthday parties for him as well. He has one on Saturday with Nathan's family and one on Halloween with my side of the family and all his cousins.

Here is a photo montage of Colin over the last 2 years. Enjoy!

Newborn

6 months

1 year

18 months

2 years

For those of you who are wondering my sister in law is doing well. She had a DNC last Wednesday and I think she feels relieved in some ways that it is done with. They are both sad, but overall they have handled it well. Thank you for all your prayers!

6 weeks and an Update

I was officially 6 weeks pregnant yesterday. I have been feeling more tired everyday and most nights am asleep before 10. I still haven't been sick. I am hoping that I will be lucky like I was with Colin and not experience morning sickness. Only time will tell I guess.

We had Thanksgiving dinner this weekend. Saturday we went to Nathan's brother, Brandon's place. All the non pregnant people were re-shingling their house for the better part of the day while Kerri and I (both pregnant), watched all the kids. It was a good day but exhausting. At the end of the night we had Thanksgiving dinner and then went home. Then on Sunday we went to my sister Tara's place for dinner. Another very tasty supper. I baked pumpkin pies for both occasions.

Nathan also had yesterday off which was nice. We really didn't do much. We went to Mcdonalds in the morning with my mom and Tara. Went to Walmart after that to look at cameras since mine is broken. After the boys napped, we got a movie, had supper and then watched the movie with the boys. Then it was bedtime again.. I swear, where does the time go? It flies by so fast. It really won't be long before this baby is born because time just doesn't stop.

5 Week Belly Picture

This picture was taken on Monday night. I am going to try to take weekly belly pictures. There isn't much there yet, but since this will most likely be my last baby I want to capture as much of this pregnancy as I can.

Kids Say the Darndest Things

Yesterday morning I was upstairs getting ready for the day. Both Colin and Joel were with me and we got to talking about the baby growing in mommy's tummy. 

Joel says to me "Mommy I want a sister."  

So I told him that he could pray and tell God that he was hoping for a sister. I said that wouldn't necessarily guarantee that I was going to have a baby girl, but he could definitely let God know what he was hoping for. 

So he went to his room to get dressed for the day. He comes back a couple minutes later and says to me "Mommy I am not going to get a baby sister because God doesn't hear me. I don't have the MAGIC words."  

LOL! I tried to keep back from bursting out laughing and told him that it didn't matter what words he said to God that he could hear him.

Very Blessed

There it is.. The 2 little lines that mean there is a new life growing inside. I am so excited, but I am also scared. I know it is normal to be scared about miscarriage. I want to be past the first trimester so the most vulnerable part of this pregnancy is over. I pray everyday that this baby stays within me and we get to meet it in 8 months.

Tomorrow I will be painting the boys new room. They are going to be moving into bunk beds and then the baby will have its own room. Colin is going to start out in Joel's current bed just so he gets used to sleeping in a bed for about 6 months and then he will move into the bottom bunk in the other room. I am going to be painting the room grey and possibly a red stripe at the top.. the theme is cars the movie so I am just going off the bedding we bought. I will post some pictures once it is all set up.

Jocelyn came over last night and we watched Made of Honor. It was good, but very predictable. Very average chic flick but we both enjoyed it anyways.

Guess thats about it! Thanks for reading guys!

Well...

I decided to take a test this afternoon after I dropped Joel off at preschool (which he goes to on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday), and I got a POSITIVE! I am pregnant! I am so excited I can barely contain it! I am still in shock a bit.. it was faint but it was definitely there! My due date will be June 8, 2009. Since I am notorious for being early it will most likely be a late May baby.

....

Another Test. Another Negative. No period yet but I think I feel the beginnings of one. I am trying not to lose hope but its not looking good. If my period hasn't shown up by Wednesday I will test again. I am not overly eager to see another negative result.

I know I haven't talked about much else besides our trying to conceive journey lately, so I will fill you in on how everything else is going for once. 

Joel is LOVING preschool. He has so much fun and loves having somewhere that he gets to go that Colin doesn't. He says to Colin all the time "Your not big enough to go to preschool. Right Mommy?" He's pretty proud of himself. 

Colin is talking CONSTANTLY. He loves to point out everything by name. He is learning his colors as well, though no very accurately at this point. He usually gets blue and orange right though. He turns 2 in 22 days. Hard to believe.. 

Nathan has been working on building a fence in our backyard. We got the posts put in the ground on Thursday night and I think he might level them today so we can pour the concrete soon. Then when his parents get back from Tennessee we are going to build the rest. 

I guess thats about it. Not too sure what we are going to today, but it will be a good day none the less just because Nathan is home.

I Cheated!

So I cheated this morning and took a test.. it was a BFN (big fat negative). Its still really early though so I don't know what I was thinking. I have never been able to get an accurate result when I test early. I am going to try again on Sunday and if I get another BFN then I will try on Tuesday if my period has not showed up by then.

Wish me LUCK!

5 Days

In 5 more days I will get to take a pregnancy test to see if I am pregnant. I really feel pregnant. I have been nauseous, moody, dizzy to the point where I have to lay down, and quite tired. I am trying my best not to read into my "symptoms" because I don't want to get my hopes up like last month. The good sign is that I haven't seen my period yet. The last 2 cycles it has shown up at about 21-22 days. I am on day 23 and still no sign of her. Still 5 days to wait to know for sure though.

Nathan is working late again tonight. I feel like I never see him. He is either working late, working overtime on the weekend, usually a 12 hour shift, or out fishing or golfing. He has literally been gone the last 4 Saturdays doing something. It really gets to me after a while. I count on that to break up my routine of a week and I really look forward to that time. Hopefully he won't be gone too late tonight, but we will have to wait and see.

I am going over to my neighbor, Gemma's to watch The Biggest Loser tonight. I love that show. I think out of all the reality on tv it is such a positive and rewarding show. I really look forward to my Tuesday nights!

So far so good on my weekly chore schedule. I stuck to it all last week and I am into my second day with it and its going well. I love having my days structured. 

Guess I better run and make supper. I will post after I test on Sunday night.

Organizing Myself

Well last week I had a bit of a mental break down. I felt like a failure as a mother and wife. My house is always a disaster, I don't play with my kids, and at the end of the day I feel like I have accomplished nothing. On Thursday night I was driving to my dentist to have a tooth filled, and instead of having a pity party and making excuses for myself I really tried to figure out how I could actually make use of my time and feel like I actually did the things that I wanted to. So I decided to make myself a weekly schedule. I sat down tonight and filled out the time I would do my chores (during nap time), I set aside 2 full hours a day to play with the boys, and all the other little things that we have going on during the week. I am quite excited about it. 

I like schedules.. I thrive on knowing what I am doing and I really think that having it laid out, especially the time set aside to play with my kids before they are too big to want to play with me anymore, will really help me feel like I am making good use of my time as a stay at home mom.

Happy Birthday to Me!

23 years ago today I was born.. at 7:56 am. I weighed 7lbs 8oz.

My neighbor ladies came over for coffee this morning. One of them baked me brownies, one baked me a cake, and one brought me a gift! My neighbors are great and I am very blessed to live near 4 other woman who are going through motherhood at the same time as me. Bekky (the one who brought me brownies) had her baby girl 23 days early.. on September 3 and we got to meet her for the first time today. What a little sweetie. Her name is Abigail Lily and she weighed 5lbs 2oz.

Joel started preschool yesterday and loves it. What a big boy he is...

Nathan and the boys are taking me to Red Lobster for all you can eat shrimp tonight. I love Red Lobster so I am quite excited!

So Here are some pictures for your enjoyment.

Someone decided to help them-self to birthday cake.. When your children are TOO quiet there's usually a reason :)

No May Baby For Me

Well my unwanted monthly visitor showed up 4 days early on Monday. Guess it won't be a May baby for us afterall. I am really hoping that this month will be our chance. I really don't want to be pregnant in the summer and the more months it takes the closer we get to that happening. If I get pregnant this month I will be due on June 7, 2009.

In other news we are 4 days into our vacation. Nothing too exciting has happened yet but we are having a good time. Colin hurt his toe yesterday though and has been limping around. We thought he might have broke it but it appears to be a bit better today. Hopefully no one else will get hurt while we are here and that no more unpleasantness will occur..

Vacation in T minus 2 days

We leave for our condo on Sunday morning. I have a lot to do, but I am looking forward to it. I love spending time with my family. I am so very blessed to have such a close knit family. I love that my kids have their cousins close in age and in distance. I know not many people have that luxury and because of it my sisters and I have remained very close through the years. I am excited to get away from it all and just be able to hang out for a week!

I am 9 days past ovulation... only 5 more until I can take a test.. I have a very good feeling about this month. I am just really hoping that I am not reading into my every "symptom" the wrong way.

Pictures and an Update.

Not too much is going on these days. I am still playing the waiting game. I have about 10 more days until I can test. That is if I don't give in early and test. My sister Tara went for her ultrasound and found out she is due March 21, 2009. That happens to be her oldest daughters 4th birthday. She is notorious for delivering on her due date too.

We leave on Sunday for Fairmont British Columbia. We have a BIG condo down there and all of my family goes for the week. It should hopefully take my mind off of wanting to test. I really feel like I am pregnant. I am trying not to read into anything but I have been dizzy lately, very tired, and have had a lot of surplus cervical mucous.

I am really hoping this is our month! May would be a great month to have a baby.

Whew!

I just wanted to write a quick note to say that everything is good! I didn't actually delete the pictures after all. I just somehow put them somewhere where the computer couldn't find them. Nathan's brother, Brandon was able to find them in about 5 seconds. He also got our iphone working too! What a huge relief!

OH MY GOD! WHAT DID I JUST DO!!!

I thought yesterday was a bad day.. It just got worse.. So very much worse. Two nights ago Nathan decided to update our iphone, not knowing that because it was a jailbreaked phone that that would screw the phone up and make it unusable. So for the past day and a half we have been working at trying to get things back to normal.. Well his brother is a bit of a computer wiz and has been helping Nathan work at fixing it over the phone. Well today I was going through some of the instructions on how to delete a certain program off our computer and some how in doing that I deleted EVERYTHING off our computer.. and I mean everything. All of our pictures, all of our documents.. every single thing! I don't know what to do.. I just want to sit down and cry! I don't even know how I can fix this. Nathan thinks his brother may be able to retrieve some of it but I don't know how.. I feel awful! I just deleted my entire life off my computer.. all of the pictures of my kids growing up. I just want to curl into a ball and die.. I feel hopeless.. I know it may sound silly but its all my fault and I don't even know how to fix it.

Babies Babies Everywhere

A month ago today my next door neighbor, Gemma, delivered a little baby girl 7 weeks early. Brooke was healthy but wasn't able to come home because of regular premie problems. Well today miss Brooke is coming home. I am so excited for them. It has been an emotional experience for them through this whole thing and poor Gemma has been anxiously awaiting this day for 4 almost 5 weeks now! I am so excited to get to meet baby Brooke for the first time. I am sure it will not help my longing for a new baby though. Oh well, I can always go next door for a snuggle whenever it becomes too overwhelming.

My sister, Tara, goes for her dating ultrasound tomorrow. The baby will be due sometime between February and March. I am hoping for the latter because then it just means our babies will be closer in age. It will be kind of neat to have the "last" baby. Joel was the first of all the babies on my side of the family, then Tara had Aysha 8 months later, and Randi had her twin girls, Teigan and Avery 2 months after that. Colin was the first of the next "set" with Randi's son, Drew, arriving 6 months later, and Tara's daughter, Adeline, arriving 2 months after that. So this time I get to have the littlest baby. That will be a kind of nice change since my kids always seemed HUGE by the time the next babies arrived.

I went and saw "Mamma Mia" last night with my mom, Randi, and Tara. It was awesome. We went and saw it live last year when it was here and it was incredible and the movie is pretty comparable. I liked the live version better but the movie is pretty comparable. I am going to be going to see it again with Nathan's mom and my sister in law, Kerri. It was that good.

Emotional Rollercoaster

I am kind of sad today. Its 4 days until my period... but it looks like she is coming early. I have never had implantation with either of my previous pregnancies so I don't think that is likely. Still a possibility but not very likely. I also took a test this morning and it came back negative. I don't know what I was expecting. I don't generally get a positive test before my period is due. I guess I just wanted to make myself depressed. So I am still waiting. If my period starts full blown then we will know for sure. I totally thought we DTD near the day of ovulation. I am still keeping my fingers crossed but I am pretty sure its not my month.

Joel leaves to go camping with Nathan's sister, Stacey, and her family this afternoon. It will be a really nice break. I am quite excited to have him go. He will have a ton of fun, and Nathan and I will get to sleep past 5:30.

***UPDATE***
She's here to stay. Thats right.. Aunt Flow is here for the duration of her weekly visit. Ugh. I was really hoping April was going to be my month.

The New Car

The Waiting Game

Ugh.. I hate playing the waiting game. I have to wait until August 12th to find out if I am pregnant this month. I am trying not to get my hopes up too high but it is hard. Everyone around me seems to be pregnant. I know it is our first month of trying but it is still hard not to believe that its gonna happen. Especially since we didn't have a hard time with either of the boys and I just pray that its the same this time around.

My sister just found out that she is pregnant. She isn't sure when she is due tho. She hasn't had a period in a long time, so she is going for an ultrasound on August 12th to find out when the baby is due. Should be sometime early next year. March at the latest.

Nathan picked up his new Mini Cooper yesterday. It wasn't the one he ordered because his other car was not going to last another 5 weeks. We ended up just picking one of the ones they had on the lot. Its a fancier model, which really means more $$$ but what can you do. He's pretty proud of it. It goes back in today to get its stripes put on the hood. I will post pictures of it when he gets home. Its a blackish blue color in a metallic shade of paint. I can't wait to learn to drive it. Its a stick shift but it has something called hill assist so it doesn't roll back on hills when your getting going, which will be fantastic for learning to drive. My last experience with standard driving was not a pleasant one so lets hope this goes a little better.

Zoom Zoom Zoom

I have a couple things to post that I forgot to write about yesterday. Firstly Nathan sold his motorcycle yesterday! The guy that bought it was unbelievably strange, but he had cash and the bike is gone so that is the main thing. Nathan is pretty sure he is some kind of drug dealer and he was worried he was going to come back and murder us in our sleep. LOL! I told him that if he was that shady of a person he would have stole a bike instead of buying one. Its pretty easy to steal a motorcycle if you want to. Two of Nathan's friends have had them stolen so we know all about that.

In other news, Nathan bought a brand new Mini Cooper Classic. Well he is technically leasing it, but we are more than likely going to buy it when our 39 month lease is up. He just gets lower payments this way and then we can decide if we like it enough to buy it. Both Nathan and I have always been a fan of the Mini so its pretty exciting. Plus he has never had a new car so its big news for him. His '91 Chevy Lumina is pretty much toast and he is just praying that it survives the 8 weeks until his new Mini arrives. I will definitely post pictures of it when it gets here!!

Well it is nap time at our house so I better run and put Colin to sleep. I sure do love nap time :)

Busy Busy

We had a very busy weekend. On Saturday we went out to Nathan's parents for his Grandma's 80th Birthday party. There was about 50 people there and most of them I didn't know. It was kind of awkward but we had a good time anyways. Joel had a blast and didn't want to come home so Nathan's sister let him camp with them for the night and Nathan's dad brought him back yesterday. He was very crabby when he got home though because he didn't get much sleep and didn't nap at all on Saturday or Sunday.

Well we are actively trying for a baby now. I am pretty sure it won't happen this month as I just got off the pill. Probably next month or the one after that. Or that is the hope anyways. With the way I am feeling today you would think I was already pregnant. I am so tired and my stomach is unsettled. Its not possible though.

We bought Joel a new bunk bed on Friday night. We will probably set it up in about a month, and then Colin will move into Joel's race car bed. Then when the new baby is born the boys will share a room and Colin will get the bottom bunk. I am both excited and nervous about having them share a room but I am sure it will be fine. I am mostly scared about Colin going into a bed and not sleeping at all since he has always been such a touchy sleeper. Since he just started sleeping through the night a couple months ago you can see where my anxiety comes from.

I better go and get something accomplished before Colin wakes up from his nap.

Two Very Special Birthdays Today

Well Joel is officially 4 today! It really is hard to believe that 4 years has past already, but I think pretty much every parent on the planet would have to agree. There little lives pass so very quickly. It really makes me sad. Last night as I was laying in bed falling asleep I felt quite guilty that I have been wishing preschool to hurry up and get here. I had this huge realization that I wouldn't get him all to myself anymore and I felt overwhelmingly sad. I guess I just kept thinking that it would be nice to get a break from him and never realized that its one step closer to him being a fully grown man. I know that sounds absurd, but if 4 years has gone by in the blink of an eye, what makes the other 14 go any slower. I just wish for one minute I could slow down the hands of time, or go back in time to relive him as an infant. To hold him close and smell him. I am getting all chocked up just thinking about it.

Today is also my Papa's birthday. He turns 80 today! Its also hard for me to believe that he is that old! I hate to think that he only has a short amount of time left on this earth. Most likely less than 20 years, so that means before I turn 43 I will more than likely have to say goodbye to a man that has meant so much to me for my whole life. A great man! A man who has been a strong rock for my entire family! Who has helped raise me and care for me! I am so very lucky to have the Grandfather that I have. He has been more like my father than my own dad has. I love him dearly!

So it looks like Nathan has most likely sold his bike. He is just waiting for the guy to go to the bank and get the money. Its a bittersweet moment for Nathan and I really do hate that he has to sell it. Motorcycling has always been a huge part of his life, ever since the time he was about 5 and he rode on behind his dad, so its like selling a piece of who he is. Man this is a sappy entry. Sorry about that. I guess I feel a little sentimental and nostalgic today.

Here are a few pictures of Joel as he has grown up, and a couple of my Papa too.

2 Days Old

6 Months Old

1 Year Old

18 Months Old

2 Years Old

3 Years Old

4 Years Old

And My Papa

Video Blog

Thought it would be fun to post a video blog instead of a written one. You just need to turn down the blog music before watching. Scroll down to the bottom of the page and click pause.

Blessed.. Even When I Don't See It

I'm not really sure how it happens, but just when I feel like I have had enough and I am frustrated beyond my max capacity my kids make me laugh and everything is right again. Its quite amazing really. Today was a decent day. Joel was his usual pain in the butt self for a good portion of the day. In Fact, at some point in the day I was willing to sell him to the highest bidder. Thankfully no one offered because I very well may have taken them up on the offer.

We headed into our regular Wednesday mom's group. It was really nice. Two of the ladies that attend recently had new babies, the one being so recent that she wasn't even here today. The other one was there though and I had a good snuggle. There is absolutely nothing like the smell and feel of a brand new baby. I can barely wait to have another one of my very own. Though the talk of sleepless nights made me reconsider my plan :). Its always a great time on Wednesdays though. The boys and I really look forward to it. It is our one guaranteed day out of the house and that is always something to celebrate.

After Nathan got home, the four of us headed over to Wal-Mart to pick up some poker chips. I am hoping that I can create a reward system for Joel in order to curb some of the negative behavior he has been having lately. I found a site online that suggested using poker chips. For all good deeds they randomly get rewarded a certain number of chips and at the end of the week can use them to "purchase" certain rewards. Joel absolutely LOVES hot wheels cars, so hopefully that will entice him to listen better. Plus they get chips taken away when they are not listening. Keep your fingers crossed for me. I am really hoping this helps.

I wanted to share a special place that I stumbled upon with all of you that read this. It is a journal of a woman who at 20 weeks pregnant learned that her baby was not going to survive. She had many medical conditions that just would not let her little body handle the harshness of our world. It doesn't sound like it would be a very uplifting story but it really is. I have very rarely witnessed a woman with such strength and faith faced with the most devastating situation. I promise that you will not be disappointed if you take the time to read it. I just ask you start at the very beginning of the story and work your way to present day.. Bring The Rain is the name of it.

Well I am off to watch the baby borrowers. Hopefully it will be as entertaining as the last couple episodes.

Kendra

Doing My Best

Everyday I strive to be the very best mommy I can be. I guess that is kind of a funny statement. I suppose most parents strive to do their best, and those that don't probably shouldn't be parents after-all. With that being said, I really struggled today. It is always a challenge on days that Nathan is gone longer than his average 7:30 to 4:00 shift. Tonight he went to "Bike Night" to see if he could get any interest on his motorcycle. He should be home soon.

The boys can be a real challenge for me on a day to day basis. Joel is at the age now where his listening skills are not that great. Its very frustrating. It feels like pulling teeth just to get him to follow simple instructions. I know it is normal for his age group, but it really is hard. I miss my sweet little boy who was always eager to please. I know its all a part of him becoming a grown man, but I just wish I had the manual on parenting so that I knew how to curb some of this behavior in the long run.

I took the boys to the park this afternoon. We had the whole place to ourselves which was nice for a change. I was able to sit back and watch the boys play. It was quite windy though so it was hard to know how to dress. One minute it was too hot and then the wind would pick up and you'd be freezing. It was really nice to get out of the house for a bit and cure some of the cabin fever I obtain being a stay at home mom. It can be really challenging to keep yourself from being bored when everyday is the same. I am really looking forward to September, when Joel goes to preschool and I can get a bit of a break from him. I love him but I think we will both benefit from having some time apart.

I have been trying to get closer to God lately. I am trying to read my bible and pray on a more regular basis. Today while the boys were napping I went into my room, closed the door and read a few chapters of Matthew. Then I prayed about it and fell asleep. I have been letting my faith slip lately and I want to pick it back up. Its a very important part of who I am and I have been so apathetic about it lately.

Striving to do my very best
Kendra

A Weekend Away

This weekend I got away from home for 2 days with my mom and sisters. We drove up to Drumheller and went to see the passion play. It was incredible! It was so nice to get away for a little while and just recharge. I think every parent needs to do this occasionally. It was so great to hang out with just the girls for a little while.  I love my boys more than life but I find I love them even more when I can just have some me time for a little while.

So we drove down to Drumheller on Friday afternoon. We left about 1 and got there at about 4. We first went to the hotel to check in, only to find out that they had over booked and we ended up having to stay at a much more rustic place. It was alright though because we didn't end up spending much time at all at the hotel, but still irritating since they didn't even compensate us in the least bit. From there we went for dinner and then headed over to the play. It was a gorgeously beautiful day and we couldn't have asked for anything better. Some years it is so hot that people are passing out left and right and they have medics standing by, so we were very lucky. 

The play was fantastic. What a faith boost. Being able to physically see the recreation of the last few years of Jesus was awesome, and very sad and heartbreaking all at the same time. Overall though it was amazing and very spiritually inspiring!

After the play went over to a friend of my mom's. My mom grew up in Drumheller and a couple of the girls she grew up with still live there so we visited with one of them on Friday night and then after breakfast on Saturday we went to visit the other one. Then my mom, 2 of my sisters and I went shopping and bought a few things for our kids. Then we headed back home. I thought we were staying until Sunday, so Nathan had planned to be at his parents the whole weekend. Because of this my mom and I decided to go out for dinner to The Keg and then we rented "Definitely Maybe". It was alright.. a little odd but not the worst movie I have ever seen. Plus it was nice to spend time with just my mom and I.

This morning my mom and I headed to church. I haven't been in a while but have recently decided that I would like to make it a regular habit for our family. I really want to raise the kids in a faith based environment and would love for them to have a foundation in the church. It was a really empty service. It might be just that its summer and a lot of people are away. I'm not really too sure. After the service I came home and Nathan and the boys had gotten home. It was nice to see them and give them their gifts. They were happy to see me too.

So I'm not really sure what we plan to do for the rest of today. Probably just hang around home since it is kind of rainy outside. Spend some time with Nathan before he has to go back to work tomorrow. Thats the worst part about being away this weekend is that I don't get very much time to spend with him now, but it was an awesome weekend and well worth it.

I guess that is long enough today. Gonna go play with the boys and spend some time with my man.

Kendra